This Week In DCBA: Draft Review

Lean, mean fighting machines aren't drafted, they're made.

Another year, another five-hour draft, but this time on 10 different computers in 4 different states, or whatever the hell D.C. is supposed to be. No, I am not smarter than a fifth-grader. I wouldn't even lie about it and say I am and suffer the humiliation of being beaten up by one. Anyhow, the first online draft in league history leaves us in line to have full rosters for a full season. The first round of the playoffs starts on April 1, but before then, let's review the draft, chew the fat, make some predictions, and then chew the fat some more. The ensuing heart attack will acclimate you sufficiently for attempting to make an easy trade. For those who are new to the DRAFT RECAPTACULAR, let me remind you that the future is a predictable place, but sometimes those predictions can be wrong. Except when they're made by me. For your reference (and amazement), a few of my deadly accurate picks from last year:

The Dirigibles:
Best pick: Gravy Sizemore
Worst pick: Jason Kendall
Steal: Matt Holliday

Prophetic Maltings:
Steal: Bill E. Hall

Naps:
Best pick: Ryan Howard

Bebop Cowboys:
Best pick: Paul Konerko
Worst pick: Alfonso Soriano
Steal: Neal Cotts

So, as you can see, I'm hoping to keep my average at 1.000.



And now, the 2007 DRAFT RECAPTACULAR!

Jackanapes: Fewest foreign-born players on roster. One year in New England has turned Chris into Mr. Patriot.
Best Pick:Carlos Delgado
Worst Pick:Jered Weaver
Steal: Mike Piazza
Grade: C

All The Wrong Cubs: Astros as first round picks two years in a row. All The Wrong Astros?
Best pick: Carlos Lee
Worst pick: Kelvim Escobar
Steal: Carlos Guillen
Grade: C

Not So Fragile Flowers: The Baltimore Orioles of the DCBA. Once again starting the season hoping this is the year they move up from 4th place.
Best pick:Brandon Webb

Worst pick:Joel Piniero
Steal: Gary Sheffield
Grade: C


Da Infidels: A mullet draft for Aamer; short in the front and long in the back. Just about as pretty.
Best pick: Robinson Cano

Worst pick: Nate Robertson

Steal: Robinson Cano
Grade: C


Festivus Miracles: His number one was actually number two. In fantasy baseball, as in real life, it's never pretty when that happens.

Best pick: Joe Nathan

Worst pick: Josh Willingham
Steal: Javier Vazquez

Grade: B-


Slipstream Starlings: Drafted the most pitchers (12). The hitters are supposed to be offensive, not the pitchers.

Best pick: Jeremy Bonderman

Worst pick: Randy Wolf

Steal: Chad Tracy

Grade:C


The Darned Sox: A Texan who didn't dodge the draft. Is shock and awe off the table, too?

Best pick: Dontrelle Willis

Worst pick: Chris Duncan

Steal: Brad Lidge

Grade: C


The Consummate Bastards: There are those who say his 4 first round picks were too many. Then there are those who say that none of those picks will be on the team at the end of the season anyhow. They're both right.

Best pick: C.C. Sabathia

Worst pick: Jhonny Peralta

Steal: Rich Harden
Grade: C


Savage Sickos: True fact: no team in DCBA history has ever won the title drafting Paul Konerko as their firstbaseman 2 years in a row.

Best pick: Erik Bedard

Worst pick: Paul Konerko

Steal: Conor Jackson
Grade: C


Naps: Champs to chumps in one year? Rip Van Winkle should be well rested before he sees this team on top again.
Best pick: Barry Bonds

Worst pick: BJ Upton

Steal: Sammy Sosa
Grade: C-



Final Projected Standings:

Savage Sickos: 20-3
Festivus Miracles: 14-9
All The Wrong Cubs: 12-11
The Consummate Bastards: 12-11
Da Infidels: 12-11
Jackanapes: 12-11
Slipstream Starlings: 12-11
The Consummate Bastards: 12-11
The Darned Sox: 12-11
Not So Fragile Flowers: 11-12
Naps: 8-15