Hot shit hitter (Jack Cust) gets dumped for hot shit pitcher (Kevin Slowey)? I guess there're Four True Outcomes. News at eleventy o'clock, with NSFW Flowers as lead anchor. This lateral move cost $4 to make.
It's a legacy acquisition of Big Hurt, an honorary dorktorate, if you will, or even if you won't, but at the "expense" of Josh Paul. Is it time for Steamrolling, Level 2? Power up with that .221/.357/.384, Naps. This lateral move cost $1 to make.
Trying to beat Jackanapes at their own game, Naps also sign the animated remains of one Alan Embree, who I guess is still pitching somewhere for a major league team. Promising bullpen arm Mike Gonzalez failed to live up to the expectations of anyone anywhere, including deez Naps. This Antiques Roadshow move cost $1 to make.
Mowin' 'em down like there's no tomorrow, or 5th inning, Sergio Mitre-Saw is extended the privilege of being acquired by the starting pitcher woodchipper that is the Slipstream Starlings. Hitting more like Mrs. Garrett, Colorado Rockie Atkins was learned the facts of fantasy baseball life. This hopeful move cost $1 to make.
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Cubs were taking some cold cuts against the Mitre before his hammy was cooked. Unfortunately, that order was probably placed before his bread was buttered.
Lunchtime.
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